I know this question always come into a woman’s mind when she starts planning for a baby.A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. So is the case with motherhood, it begins the moment you see those two lines on the Pregnancy test or does it? I feel that it begins the moment you contemplate over having a baby. Yes, motherhood comes naturally to us women , even to someone like me, who had a strong dislike for children, but before you do take the plunge, sit back and ask yourself, Am I ready to be a Mom?
Deciding to have a baby is the most emotional decision in a woman’s life, where in most cases heart prevails over head. It is a lifelong commitment, which is going to change your life forever. Motherhood comes with a huge responsibility and incredible rewards. So whenever you decide to have a baby it should be a calculated decision.
In India, people expect you to share the khush khabri, as soon as you get married. Do not give in to that pressure. It should he the last reason on your list of “why to have a baby”. I don’t even think, it qualifies as a reason.
Are you two ready to have another person in your life, who will take up almost all of your time? Are you two comfortable enough with each other? Do you see a long term future together? Are you ready to make lifestyle changes which a baby will require? Is having a baby an expression of love or a desperate attempt to save a failing relationship? If its the latter, the move might backfire, so think hard. Long story short, both of you should be on the same page. Even if one of you has the slightest of doubt, it is best to postpone the idea.
Raising a baby is not a cakewalk… physically, emotionally and financially. Its is an ongoing commitment which is not going to reduce with time. So think and plan at least five years ahead. If both of you are working, will it be OK , if one of you decides to take care of the baby full time? Or if both of you continue to work, how will the baby be taken care of… day care, grandparents, work from home. It is best to consider all the options beforehand.
Everything said and done, it is YOU who will be bringing this baby into the world. It is you, who will have to go through the morning sickness, the uncontrollable hunger or loss of apetite, the weight gain , the stretch marks, the labour, the delivery. Sure, these things are a small price to pay for the end result but the journey can be difficult. People will be there to support you and care for you, but it will be your journey, no one else will experience what you will. It will not end with pregnancy, it will continue for your lifetime. Like it’s said, once a mother always a mother. There will be a tiny person, completely dependent on you, you will be his everything!!
So ask yourself these questions and you will get the answer of your biggest question ” Am I ready to be a Mom”? Having stated the above, I also do feel that there will never ever be a perfect time to have a baby. Something or other will keep on coming. So , its best to not stress too much about it, if both you and your partner are ready and you have a basic support structure, it will not hurt to take the plunge. Minor bridges can be crossed as they come.